Lose weight by hiding it somewhere you'll never find it...

Don't worry the reason I haven't updated this in a while isn't because I have been off scoffing pies and hiding the scales. Ok maybe I was scoffing a little but hey it was Christmas and I didn't anger the Gods of Diet and Exercise too much. Going to quit my jibber jabber now and get straight to scales results...

62.5kg I started out the blog at 70kg. As you know I am a complete foodie and eat out at least 5 times a week so I haven't changed my eating habits just took up a love affair with my iPod and the treadmill...Started off jogging for 15 minutes and went from there. One tip is get yourself a great playlist... It doesn't have to be your typical up tempo gym tunes... I have everything from FatBoy Slim to Rick Ashley to Daft Punk to Glee... I know I know I can't believe I admitted to it either. Just don't judge me too much- It works! Here are the latest pictures....

 

 

"Whether you think you can or you can't, you're right!" (Henry Ford)

The Secret of Effective Weight Loss

I have finally found the answer to the million dollar question. I must patent it.


It's Eat less and Exercise more.... Who would have thought eh.

Over a stone gone. Half to go. It is five weeks to go to my California trip. The thing about California is that are all skinny ass biatches over there. If I went as is I'd be sleeping on Venice Beach and be awoken with a pails of water being thrown on me and this...

Next year I am going back to Orlando. I am regarded as pure skinny over there!

If  it Tates Good- Spit it out- Author Unknown

The Keith Barry / Red Fm Diet.

I will let you in on this diet secret.Not even going to charge you, get you to sign up or ask you to send money to the starving children in Africa...  Its called the "see yourself on Ustream diet in Red Fm with Keith Barry looking like a Heffalump" Diet. It is extremely effective. After the inital crying into the keyboard whilst stuffing donuts in your gob and rubbing your extra two chins....(yes multi tasking is my forte) it became a really easy to do diet...
http://www.ustream.tv/recorded/14829777

Down 9lbs... Woohoo (Does the Carlton from Fresh Prince dance).

My new career as a Magician

It took a few weeks but I have managed it. I can do this really cool trick there when I sit down my belly button ring disappears.

Into the rolls of fat.
Back to the gym tonight for me.

Insert Whinge Here

I'm not one for whinging.(cough cough) Or making excuses but holy crap I have had a few weeks of it. First my I threw out my back- which still isn't back to normal ( that's the excuse right there) then work got really busy and stressful then as soon as I finished up work for the holidays I get sick... not man flu stick. Real sick. I am miserable. I really cant wait to get back to myself. The happy healthy myself. The drag my ass to the gym three times a week and pretend I hate but secretly feeling like high fiving  and chest bumping people on the way out the door the last session on Friday feeling.

Roll on January that's what I say....

I is brokeded

I tried to tell ye. Ye didn't believe me. I am a klutz.
I threw my back out. Soft tissue damage. Boo hoo.

My dog ran under me and put me air bound and of course I couldn't land anyway dainty... Big tree fall hard.

Can you see why I got her? So small and cute at 8 weeks.

Not so small and cute... Petite women obviously don't run in the Moloney household.

I know that I whinged ... moaned... stalled... complained... begged... distracted...I take it back! I take it back! Doctor doesn't think I'll be back in the gym for 2 weeks...  I only have 2 weeks left in my course..

"Humor is mankind's greatest blessing"- Mark Twain.

Confessions of a Spinning Virgin

You know the pictures. The beautiful fresh faced fully made up female on the bike with white towel hanging perfectly around her neck. Pink water bottle in hand. Smiling.
Its NOT like that.

You think hey I used to have a bike like twenty years ago.... Used to spend hours on the thing. How hard can one forty five minute spin class be..
Then Pencil man walks in. Damn.

After feeling like a pure helpless girl having to get the instructor to adjust my bike for me (felt the need tell him that I can change a tyre but I decided to keep my trap shut and not to draw attention to myself) I hopped on...
Things were going fine till this resistance thingy. Resistance thingy wasn't so bad until standing up came into play..
I'm only being a drama queen. I knew there was going to be standing etc and he told us to keep the resistance low until we got used to the classes- apparently he wants us to come back not run for hills after the first ever session..after fifteen minutes of his class if I thought there was a hill nearby I would have taken off.

The class it self was not as bad as I thought.As it just happened to be all ladies Pencil man kept it light hearted and fun but still tough...with a little bit of banter between us all every now and then...

The Pencil Man

I wouldn't regard myself as a violent person. Heck I'm actually quite a placid ol girl. I can't understand why I am having such violent thoughts regarding pencils.
Yes pencils.

Actually I DO know why I am having these violent urges.

Michael.

"You HAVE to touch the pencil. If you don't touch the pencil during the sets you are not doing it properly and it doesn't count."

I won't even go into explaining- Because if you have ever had a PT session with Michael you will know what I mean and no doubt have these urges too. Maybe I will set up a support group...

"Pain is weakness leaving the body"

The Weigh-In...Dun Dun Duuuun

Thinking maybe its time actually include my stats. But in LaymansLaydees terms- A whole dress size. 14 to 12 . Result.

Starting/Week 2/Week 6

Weight:70/67/66.4

Body Fat %:46/40/29.4

Body Fat kg:32.2/26.9/19.7

Lean %:54.9/59.9/70.6

BMI:23.5/22.3/22.2

Waist:85/83/77

Chest:107/101/99

Hips:85/83/79

And the dreaded pictures.

Week Before I Started



Week 1



Week 4 (standing beside my beautiful size 6 sister!)



Week 6

I am happy with the results. My waist is looking more hourglass than tree trunk which is great(",) I am actually enjoying my high energy levels too. My body feels a lot stronger. Yes maybe the results would be better if I went the 6 weeks without breaking the diet- but hey! Now where are those celebratory pies...



 

Pre Weigh-in Shenanigans

Damn you scales damn you.

I know I know I was told that the scales may not come down due to the muscle I am building but seriously I'm a woman! I NEED to see it on the scales...I seem to be stalling...

I even bought another scales...Disgraced for myself...At least i can throw one out the window on Friday after the weigh in if I'm not down...




I am a bit worried that my falling off the wagon (well more jumping off the wagon and eating everything in sight like a Tasmanian Devil and quickly climbing back on the wagon sheepishly wondering if anyone saw me) is the reason... Maybe it will all be okay and a bit of pre weigh in panic will keep me on track for next week.. if that doesn't then I'm sure Sgt Squat and Lieut Lunge's training sessions will produce some results...

Trials and Tribulations of Exercise & Diet.

This is exactly how my week was.

I feel the same way...

Bunnies and Bow Wows

 Week 5 it is...Gulp that means there is a weigh in a comin'....
Have every of intention of getting a few extra gym visits in before it but who am I kidding-When I'm in there on the mandatory three sessions all I do is try to get as little done as possible . I am trying various methods of instructor distraction but find that if you can get the instructor to belly laugh you get at least 20 seconds- and lets face it... I am pretty funny. That or they are just pretending and die a little inside every time I crack a joke. I bet they are in the staff room drawing straws to see who gets to train the loony gym bunny boiler.



Ah I am just kidding about doing as little as possible- I do try my best- I have also learned how to do the plank and squats properly on Wills sessions. He is a ding er at  showing techniques. Also my mutts are getting their paws walked off them in the last 5 weeks. I remember a time when I used to go to the kennels with the leads and the dogs used to bound around in excitement trying to get out for the walk. Now they hesitate and hope that I had a gym session so I wont bring them over the 5 mile walk...  Look at them last Sunday wrecked from the walk...

Must bring them into Chris for a body fat analysis bet they are down as much as me...(",)

You Had me at Wine

I know. I know. I'm only cheating myself.

I fell off the wagon. Well is it called "falling" if it was planned?

I went to the last one six months ago with Tom Doorley  and I loved it. Food was devine and don't even get me started on the wines.....I couldn't resist it. Four weeks of being so faithful to my diet I  jumped into the carb sack for one night and one night only. But I didn't over do it- Yes there were six courses but they were small... cough cough.....Anyways enough about the carbs smarbs... back on the wagon and time to concentrate on my 6 week weigh in....

People have begun to notice my bodyshape changing with the gymwork and dieting which is motivating ...although my little black dress was nearly ruined by me walking around like Shrek in a Dress/John Wayne from Wills workout on Wed night- Seriously someone needs to tell that boy  I didnt sign up for bootcamp! I could just about do 20kg squats with Sgt Squat and then Will has to go and make me do 50kg squats in the Testosteroneville part of the gym.You know the area with the Freeweight men and the wifebeater vests...Throws the weights on the ground after a set, grunts, beats chest etc I feel myself becoming a little less feminine the more time I spend there...

STRESSED is  DESSERTS spelled backwards Coincidence? I think not-  - Author Unknown

3 weeks down.... 9 to go....

Gym instructors. They are funny ol things.



Let's do this!




Can't really bitch about the diet anymore so that only leaves the seven instructors to have a go off....








One instructor is so "mean" that he doesn't even give me the deserved 15 second rest between sets. He used to give me 10 and now its reduced to 5 seconds. And if you think you can distract him with idle chat and go over the 5 second rest period he takes the  extra seconds off the next set!


Just kidding about the bitchin- am enjoying it to much for that. I know they might say different as I tend to beg at the start of every session for them to take it easy or whinge all through that the weight is to heavy or (gasp) lie about the weight used in the last session so I might get away with a few kgs. I have even lowered myself at the start of a session to ask one if maybe they just wanted to sit and talk instead of the workout. That didn't work either. Damn. Losing my touch...




"Inside me lives a skinny woman crying to get out. But I can usually shut her up with cookies..." Author Unknown

Assesment time

Finished my 12 days in a row training on Friday, which ment weigh in time!

My body fat percentage was what I was hoping to reduce and try not to focus on the the scales as the training should be building muscle which weighs heavier than fat...
I lost 3kgs and 6% body fat. IN JUST 12 DAYS! and loads of inches from all over but I won't bore you with all the measurments!
I was ecstatic. It made all the earlier days of lusting after bread and dragging my ass into the gym after long days at work worthwhile.



Nothing tastes as good as being thin feels. Author Unknown

1 week down 11 to go...

Can't believe one week is over all ready. Fortunately for you there will be no more carb breakdowns on the blog.. as the worst is over and done with. Best is yet to come...  I have soooo much energy. Don't believe me?

This is me after running the mini marathon with my 12 year old sister Patricia and her Friend Aimee yesterday .
Ran the marathon after my gym session with Ewa.

This is me, Dave Mac from Red FM and the lovely ladies from Amore Bridal  after running the mini marathon last year. It was a competition where I had to run the marathon in a wedding dress against another Bride to Be. I won and my friend received  the €2,000 voucher. Video link from Red Fm below :
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-gcA_HJ7KFA




 Last year I found it tough as I had to run most of it with the fear of the other Bridezilla beating me to the finish line.The nearest I had ever been to running was watching Forest Gump... Was in bits after it ...was walking around like John Wayne for days. This year it didn't take a tack out of me. I don't feel any worse today than I do after a work out in the gym . I take back all I said before about never setting foot inside the gym after the twelve week course is over (that was the lack of carb crash talking).


End of week one tip:
Never talk or attempt to make conversation during a set. The trainer will presume the weight is too light and bump it up (",).

I keep trying to lose weight... but it keeps finding me!  ~Author Unknown

D4 Carb Crash

What do you get when you add:

• Low carb diet
• Daily intensive weight sessions, 
• Busy stressful work week,
• School reunion that I am organising thats happening tomorrow...

CARB CRASH! OH YEAH

 I have done Low carb about 18 months ago- So I know that it will have passed by tomorrow and I will have boundless energy from then on but that didnt make me feel any better today.

But being the trooper I am I struggled on and headed for the gym...

Thats me there on the left.

The Trooper. (",)

Arrived into the gym wondering  who was gonna bring the pain today... It was Gordon aka Sgt. Squat to the girls in the BLT (bums,legs & tums ) Class... BTW Im not a lover of  squats and what could be worse than squats. Squats with weights. but thank you up there it was only two sets- and the rest of the session flew- It was very enjoyable.

I thought for a while during the session I might actually be getting used to this gym lark and could see it being a regular part of my lifestyle... Untill.... Gordon recommened that I try "Pump" (workout class using bodybars and dumbells) after the 12 weeks...I thought after the 12 weeks I am never putting my (hopefully by then) skinny ass near a gym ever again... Going to maintain my svelte figure by sipping on champagne and nibbling on strawberries... I heard thats how Victoria Beckham does it....



Aerobics:  a series of strenuous exercises which help convert fats, sugars, and starches into aches, pains, and cramps.  ~Author Unknown

D3 Carbs and Cringes

I think the first week of the diet is going to be the hardest. I looove my food... washed down with a good glass of merlot of course... Ok I am making myself out to be a complete winebibber here.....Im not! I stay within my weekly recommended units of alcohol... yes I do save them all up and have them in one go... JK I don't!!!
"The Lady Doth Protest Too Much MeThinks".......

 Eating the usual Low Carb stuff. Eggs for brekkie,  prawn or chicken & bacon salads for lunch- and meat with 2 veg  for dinner. Sugar free jelly or apple for dessert- Snacking on small amounts nuts and cheese throughout the day... am doing ok.. although as the night is going on I would run away with anyone for a slice of toast....



Today was with Lucie. She informed me we were going to do upper body session again today. I died a little inside (",) I was still so sore from Monday.. Every action  that involves moving my arms I debate do I really NEED to do it. I went to work today with messy hair after lifting the brush up to my head once tand yelping I thought  feck it.. Going to be in the office all day- with no reps calling no one is going to see me. IF the soap dispenser in the toilets were six inches higher I probably wouldn't  have bothered with soap all day.. thats how sore I was. Yes I am a classy bird.

We did a repeat of Mondays upper body then moved on to some free weights which I had never done before. When the words "now this set requires a bit of co-ordination"  came out of her mouth I knew I was in trouble...  I wish I was of those pretty little dainty women pottering around the gym (with full make up on-WTF is that about?) that seem to do everything with ease and without even breaking a sweat but alas I am not small, dainty or Co-ordinated- I have talents. I know I do but  none of the ones that are required to glide around a gym. So after the initial imagining the differerent things that could happen involving- me, packed gym and free weights- I gave it a go.. only nearly hit the guy in the gob that was behind me once... Lucie had great patience- didnt get mad at me once just smiled and said " bring it out to the side Sue not behind you"...  got it in the end.. kinda ...CRINGE!  I am going to be saying that a lot- its part of my vocabulary at this stage.. I am always just doing or saying the most stupid things when I am nervous or in front of people I don't know very well.. Today one of the other trainers which I am sure I have ever only said hello to once or twice passed and said " Howya getting on?" to which I replied "Great! You don't have a slice of bread on ya do ya?" Yes cringe. Maybe I have tourettes? but not the one that you tic curse words..  oh noooooo...I tic like I think Im a fecking stand up comedian... a bad one at that...

D2

Felt a little apprehensive/nervous today again wondering "who I was gonna have" ... You know that going into an exam without having studied feeling. I guess  its going to be like that untill I make my way through all the trainers and get to know their style,what they are going to make me do and how hard they are gonna make me work..

I had Ewa today.  Great  Lower Body session. Its was actually nice  for a change to have a woman train you. (That actually sounds a little sexist but its MY blog and I make the rules!) I was so used to the boys doing the BLT  (if you are a member you have to try it) classes over the last few months. Not that I prefer  women it was just a nice change- To be chatting about make up and boys etc... ya right - only conversation going on consisted of "Sheeze Ewa are you trying to break me"- ok so that never happened either.

Like yesterday I loved learning how to use new machines.Ones I used to stare at while pounding the treadmill thinking how complicated do they look- You know the ones that look like snazzed up versions of torture machines that 90% of the women in the gym never touch.

Still sore from yesterdays upper body and I presume going to be sore from todays  lower which is making me wonder which part of my body is left for them to work on tomorrow....




You can't lose weight by talking about it.  You have to keep your mouth shut.  ~Author Unknown